I am a fucking idiot who can barely write any coherent shit without having someone else tell me what to do," says an angry grizzled man with a white moustache, “but I’m here now because you asked for some dumb-ass writing on ‘Geese: cybersecurity videos and why it’s important.’ As far as I can see, everyone these days needs fucking protection from computer hacks. So if there are any goosebrains reading this blog who don’t know what a goddamn hack is or how to prevent one, let me tell you: Cybersecurity videos exist for a reason. It ain’t because your grandpa knows the secret password to your iCloud account from 2015 and wonders if he can still log in with it these days.” “So why do cyberhacks happen? Well there are lots of reasons, but one biggie is that people just don’t know jack shit about protecting their data. That includes everyone including me. I am a computer hacker who sometimes forgets to change my passwords or turns on the wifi in an airport for no good reason because the network names confuse me and then I get all hacked up with viruses and stuff.” “But guess what, dumbasses? You don’t need to be a computer genius like me who has been reading ‘hacking101’ blogs since they invented computers. All you have to do is watch some cybersecurity videos on YouTube or read the Cybersecurity FAQ for Dummies at Amazon (they actually exist and are pretty good). And if that ain’t enough, just ask me anything you wanna know about online safety because I am an expert in this stupid fucking field.” "So get yourself some cyberhack protection today before your life starts turning into a big mess thanks to people like me who will break the bank of every company on earth and steal their data, just for kicks. And no more mentioning humans or any human activities in this blog please! It’s annoying as hell.