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Whenever I see any of this guy’s work I always think of the one that was so absolutely vile even he stopped selling it. Guy’s molesting his daughter, a neighbor finds out, and instead of reporting or anything, wants in. Daughter comes up positive on an STD test at a checkup, and the doctor confronts the guy. Instead of reporting, doctor’s a Jack Chick brand Christian, so just prays with him. Guy goes home and tells his wife about what he’d been doing, and how it’s all okay, because a dead Jewish guy forgives him, so no need to suffer any actual consequences. Wife admits she knew and had been abusing the daughter for having the audacity to be molested. They call the daughter in, and she’s not a teenager or anything as might have been assumed which would be bad enough, but a straight up toddler. So she’s got a possibly lifetime illness, a lifetime of trauma, but it’s all okay, because Jesus.
What the fuck did you just make me read
Fucking hell, I went to find it and none of this is an exaggeration. Even Chick’s website doesn’t publish it, and there are some deeply repulsive offerings on there. It’s called Lisa, if anyone else wants to make themselves sad
The comic being fully committed to the idea that D&D teaches you actual magic spells that actually work in real life is fucking wild. Like, bro, this is supposed to be Christian propaganda but you’re out here telling me that one small spell can get me $200 of D&D sourcebooks? Sign me the fuck up for Satan, this Jesus dude ain’t shit.
But you need the sourcebooks to learn the spell…
This is supposed to be Christian propaganda? So the fucked up comic by the same guy that one of the other comments is talking about is actually serious instead of being a story about how much Christianity sucks? That’s seriously fucked up …
Welcome to Chick tracts! Evangelicals like (or used to like, dunno if they still do) buying copies to leave in public bathrooms, on public benches, etc. Somehow this is supposed to ‘bring people to God’.
The after church crowd used to leave them instead of tips at my first restaurant
Oof. At least it’s not the fake $20 bills, I guess? Real asshole move either way.
My kids got one instead of candy for trick-or-treating one year.
I had one left on my door once, and in the most amazing time my gyno office had a huge random stack someone left and I took every single one.
Handed them all to friends to see the batshitness.
Guy use to go to conventions and hand them out.
Definitely still do.
It’s not actual propaganda per se, evangelicals in particular are trying to provoke a reaction they can try to litigate. It’s a grift.
Yes, but the price of that temporary earthly magic is your immortal soul!
So, theoretically, it’s not worth it.
Yeah but J-Dawg can get you endless fish and breadsticks for snacking while you play
*terms and conditions may apply
“Yo, you brought snacks? Awesome! What’d you bring?” “Fish sandwiches.” “I… Um… Thanks, Jesus… Anything to drink?” “My blood.”
Dude’s BAC is so high his blood is wine
Sounds like a good dinner to me
Eh, not really a wine guy, personally.
Neither am I, I was just gonna drink some of the blood
That one VTM player: “Your blood? Can I diablerize the son of God? And if so, does Jesus count as a 0th generation vampire, being an aspect of God, or a 1st generation vampire, being God’s son and childe?”
Jesus is a lich
The cleric version of a lich is a Mummy Lord.
Jesus is Mumm-Ra?
Imagine finding 5.000 fishes when you come home.
All I get from that is that D&D gives you super powers, and the author of that comic is envious because they never got invited to play.
$200? What, she got like two books and shitty generic plastic figures? Big deal.
The inflation calculator that I found online says that’s the equivalent today of about $600 compared to the mid 80s when this was written.
But yeah, that is underwhelming for having literal magic powers.
Just roll up a new character with all the same stats and a slightly different name, like everyone else.
“My name is Bringler Bunderpatch, and you killed my fifth cousin twice removed, Gringle Jimblesnaps. Prepare to die.”
Black Leaf is dead!
LONG LIVE GREY LEAF!
According to the story, if your character dies in-game, by that point you’re so addicted to the black magic that you ultimately can’t go on living without it.
Nope, I’m pretty sure RAW says you have to leave the rumpus room forever.
A friend at our table struggles to roll over a 4 on a d20.
Sometimes I think Dark Leaf had it too good.
Me at the table: fuck the challenge rating, let’s do this shit!
… I’m not dead? Well that was boring.
In my current campaign, I’ve tried thrice to die. The DM always pulls some bullshit and lets me survive :(
I would understand the concomitant urge to act like you’re an Indestructible Demigod of Finding Out, but the wisdom of my years are telling me that you need to maybe have a heart to heart with the DM, and explain how the stakes don’t feel real if you’re always one bad roll away from a Deus Ex Machina. Tell them that they should feel free to let fate take its toll, that you accept the risk, and that you will do your level best to have any accidental deaths mean something and contribute to the story.
Haha yeah, that’s definitely the right way to go, but the problem is not wrong expectations. He already DM’d a campaign for me a few years back and I knew what I was getting into. It’s just not his style. I crave for gritty old-school dungeon crawling, while he loves narrative-heavy games where dialogue takes priority and backstories tie heavily with in-game events.
It’s not all bad though, we still have fun, and my group takes turns at DMing - we all get to play what we like eventually, and offers variety in the long run. I would not play tabletop with any other group.
I had something like that with my last group. I was the guy who was always playing someone crazy to die for some reason or another, but when it came my time to DM I’d do way too much worldbuilding and make everything insane and lore driven. I still haven’t found a new group after moving far away, I miss it.
