Kovukono
- 27 Posts
- 54 Comments
Unfortunately, that’s going to be entirely dependent on her. But if you do try to bury it to keep it from her, you’ll be risking it coming up later, too. The upside is that if she does accept, you’ll have someone to talk to and confide in, and who can help you through the process.
I figured it out around the time I turned 34. It destroyed my marriage and made me the most depressed I ever have been. It’s become a secret that I want out, but am terrified it’d ruin my relationship with my family and friends. There’s so much positivity about transitioning, but it’s been the most transformative experience of my life for reasons entirely separate from my body.
That said, my experience is unlikely to be yours. And even mine has some joy in it. Some of the first glimpses of happiness on the other side of depression were being able to look in the mirror and see at least some of the woman I wanted to be. It’s also been liberating because of things like your question about sexuality. There’s no rules, no requirements, and it’s entirely to you to decide your identity.
I’m not going to say it’s easy. HRT, in particular, has been a hell of a thing. You get to feel more, but that swings so hard both ways. There’s been days that have been starting out well and end in tears for inconsequential reasons. But the most important thing I’ve found is a support network. Having someone, anyone to talk to makes it easier. If you can afford a therapist, I’d highly recommend it.
The point of this downer of a comment is that despite all the bad that’s come with it, I’m still all in on this. I can’t un-realize it, I can only repress it, and that does no one any good. The answer of “wtf you’re supposed to do with this” is different for everyone, but it doesn’t have to be a burden. It is what you make of it, and even with the hurt it’s caused, it’s been something that I’ve grown to love. You don’t have to pick out new clothes or start presenting yourself to others today, or even this year. Go however fast you’re comfortable with, and know that (at least with the Internet, and maybe even in your town) there’re resources that can help, if you reach out.
Kovukono@pawb.socialto Gaming@lemmy.zip•In Neurocracy, it's up to you to solve a murder mystery through the internet's greatest resource, WikipediaEnglish8·23 days agoIf you’re looking for something similar, but don’t want the multiplayer aspect, you should take a look at The Roottrees Are Dead.
Kovukono@pawb.socialto Canada@lemmy.ca•Parents decry police protest response after baby exposed to tear gas at Montreal family eventEnglish8·2 months agoIt really feels like the SPVM have a blank check to abuse LGBT+ anti-capitalist protestors. They broke up an entire march with tear gas and chased down the protestors with cars and bikes in March, all because a cop got some paint on his uniform. And that was after they went through the crowd trying to provoke responses before the march started. That was a pro-trans rights, anti-capitalist protest. This feels like more of the same.
Kovukono@pawb.socialto TenForward: Where Every Vulcan Knows Your Name@lemmy.world•Do you chums have a fantasy crew list?English2·3 months agoIt’s not entirely Star Trek, but The Babysitter had a similar question.
Kovukono@pawb.socialto Rough Roman Memes@lemmy.world•Turns out, mocking a psychopathic Emperor for being a psychopath has negative resultsEnglish11·3 months agoI’ve learned so many things from these memes. You absolutely could consider writing a book, given how captivating your delivery is.
Kovukono@pawb.socialto Gaming@lemmy.zip•Stellaris updates are slowing down to stop empires randomly destroying themselves, among other bugsEnglish7·4 months agoYeah, but it’s starting to feel like there’s more downsides. They’ve put out so much DLC that they’re literally offering a monthly subscription service to get access to all the DLC. The new DLC costs $25 (base game costs $40), and comes with a game-breaking patch that couldn’t have been shipped without knowing there were glaring issues, and a disclosure that AI was used to make some of the assets. It’s getting harder to feel that you’re seen as a playerbase instead of a cash cow.
Kovukono@pawb.socialto Gaming@lemmy.zip•Stellaris updates are slowing down to stop empires randomly destroying themselves, among other bugsEnglish6·4 months agoLike every major release, they redid some management elements, so people are unhappy about that. But the big thing was that 4.0 was a patch intended to address performance with how pops were handled, so the mid-late game was playable at a good speed. Instead the update made performance issues worse, and apparently even with a bunch of hotfixes performance is still bad, and there’s a lot of issues caused by the patch other than performance.
Blue Period is mine. I can’t quite name why, but it just resonates with me every time. I’d love a second season, but the anime nearly caught up to the manga when it was released.
I don’t think it is. I looked it up and couldn’t find anything further in the thread from them. Their account has been deactivated, so (I think) the original is gone and we just have reblogs. Wayback Machine doesn’t have it either.
There’s a version that has a bit more.
Kovukono@pawb.socialto Steam Deck@sopuli.xyz•What games did you get down with over the holiday weekend?English4·4 months agoMonster Train 2. The first scratched the itch I had when I had run out of steam with Slay the Spire, and the second has built on top of the first with some new card classes, giving you different abilities for your engine, and five new races with new mechanics for each. It’s fantastic, and really feels like everything you’d want out of a sequel. And as a nice bonus, it’s not too hard on the Deck’s battery.
I got informed there’s a follow-up.
I know you’re looking for people currently living there, but I left not long after Trump got elected the first time (coincidence, not cause), and I feel like it’s helped me be a bit more objective about it.
I’ve seen my dad go from a die-hard conservative who makes a couple edgy jokes to someone who isn’t even trying to hide his support for Trump. At best, he says that Trump’s statements are overblown, at worst he supports them wholeheartedly. It didn’t improve under Biden’s term, and his behavior was one of the big reasons I feared a Trump victory in 2024. He felt no need to hide what he had before (that is, if he had it then. It could have grown over time as well). There was no reform coming for him, just deeper entrenchment.
On the other hand, my sister and Mom represent some of another segment of the US. Neither one follows politics because they’re just busy. When they do have time to relax, the last thing they want to do is catch up on things they’ve missed. Unless my sister has something blasted across her social media feeds, she doesn’t know about it. My mom just doesn’t really watch anything at all, mostly because she’s dealing with her own stuff.
I got to see the US change drastically when Trump got elected, with issues that affected literally everyone, and it turned out that part of my family ignored it, and the part that did know about it supported it. I know my immediate family isn’t a representative sample of the entire US (hell, they’re not even representative of my entire family), but seeing is believing. I never would have thought that people could be like this, but if this can happen to people I know, it’s not that hard to see it happening to others.
So, yeah. Even assuming Trump peacefully leaves power in 2029 (I’ve got no hopes of removal from impeachment), that’s four years of destroying good will, soft power, government services, and legal protections, and this is happening just after we had a president who, at best, could stabilize the country a bit before building back some of what was torn down in the four years prior. This time, the administration is moving faster and with more purpose in some of these areas, too. Assuming it takes twice the amount of time to completely rebuild all that the Trump administrations have removed, that’s still 20 years down the road to be at par with where we were 8 years ago. Foreign countries don’t trust the US to not elect a lunatic. It can be a normal country, some day, but not until I’m old, and not without a lot of internal changes I don’t see happening yet.
Kovukono@pawb.socialto Canada@lemmy.ca•Quebec to impose full ban on cellphones in schoolsEnglish1·5 months agodeleted by creator
If you’re interested in kind of a larger version of this premise, there’s a book called [The Dragon’s Banker] (https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/49405286-the-dragon-s-banker) by Scott Warren that has a dragon trying to re-establish his wealth during the time that the government is changing from the gold to the paper standard (the book is mostly about the banker, though).