I have to go to the dentist today to get my teeth cleaned. Here have a Hazel butt.
Thlllis is a daily post for “casual” conversation. If you want to post or talk about something non autism related this is where to do it. For example if you want to info dump about your special interest but it doesn’t fall into “autism related” then you can post it here in the comments. All other rules are still active, be respectful to each other.
Sharing because I wonder if this might be helpful for other late diagnosed folks:
My mom is visiting and I’m suddenly remembering what it’s like to be around NTs (or NT’s culture/expectations because I don’t think she’s NT) and it’s honestly distressing. Which she of course takes personally.
When she woke up and joined me on the couch and I used my words to say I wasn’t ready for conversation. Then I got up to bring the blue jays their breakfast because they were screaming for it, and that apparently was a signal that I wanted to chat now? So now I’m scared to move because my ability to speak is on its last legs and we’re going to go straight to the sobbing soon. Another example is that for the first time in a long time (maybe since she last visited???) I took my glasses off because I was done with seeing for the day. I suddenly understand why I was basically this until I moved out:
My office is also the guest bedroom so I don’t have anywhere to hang out but the living room, being perceived.
At least I’m getting a lot of notes to share on my next assessment appointment? I was really struggling to come up with answers to the questions last time about my struggles. When you are married to another ND and you love and respect each other you can craft a life that is for the most part most excellent for your specific needs.
We spend so much time in silence next to each other, literally just vibing. We can communicate a lot without speaking, we don’t talk for the sake of talking, we ask the questions we want answers to (sometimes we don’t really know what we are asking/what what we want an answer to but we refine the question as we go and try to figure it out together). We do talk for reasons other than exchanging information - we both use each other as sounding boards and process our days out loud with each other, or show each other memes, or point out something interesting going on in the garden etc. But the memes/observations aren’t there to elicit a response, or a request for the other person to take on the task of carrying forward a conversation exchange. I wear my headphones, or hang out in my office if he wants to rock out so he can do that comfortably without feeling like he needs to suppress it. I love our life together 🥰
For the love of god, if you can live without accomodations, don’t get diagnosed. You become a minority, which means you get treated worse, than a ball of shit in most countries.